the silence of the everlasting days

now what

diapers and dandelions

drawing the curtains

deciphering the squeals and babbles

wiping and unwiping

two times a day

if i'm lucky

we exchange words

often short

but important

this other piece

living off of chicken pot pies and hotel wi-fi

drilling holes into our power supply

paying for the diapers

the curtains

the wiping

somewhere in there

remain two who remember

kissing under stars

waking up still drunk

laughing

until we were sober.

easter 2009. marshall, nc.

more easter 2009. marshall, nc.

there are
reasons
i'd rather not say
but i made banana bread
today

easter 2009 photos: (be-lated, of course)
(this is where i want to be most of the time)

it cuts so close...

and even the air
brittles up
stale and waiting
clearing and oddly luminescent
curling in tiny intricate corinthian cues.

the chords strike a tiny tune
i listen to the cars
i don't look up
i continue
and the perfect frozen bell curve on the storm window
melts as the light passes
down through the pane.

ruminations and blatterbutter.

the stomach is all tied up
each silent moment
phone refusing to ring
forget the forgotten
emptying the trash, taking out the compost
sleeping and not sleeping
change the baby
repeat the scenes
edit the emotion
unable to breathe without losing hope
even if the world is with us on this one
the white continues
center stage
bright lights
hospital bills and slammed doors
private claustrophobia
circulation
cut
off

great green gobs of time and resurrender.

i'm growing like a poofball mushroom, and i'm getting more and more ready to shed my spore.

this tiny marshmellow of a person who struggles against my flesh, awaiting the ripe moment.

i breathe, i practice the art of belly, i try not to eat too much ice cream.

life moves faster and in slow motion all at once, and in truth,

i know my tiny speck of the sphere

will change forever 

in 87 days, give or take.

i'm not really going anywhere, i'm just moving to a different frequency

on the evolutionary dial.